Wayne Carey

But it was with the ladies that Wayne Carey had the most problems. The first incident that saw him cop a high-profile guilty plea was back in 1996:

The assault occurred when Carey and a group of friends were walking down King Street after a night out [at 9am].

They approached the woman, who was with a female friend.

Carey grabbed her breast and said, "Why don't you get a bigger set of tits?".

Wayne Carey jokes:

A new poll asked 1,000 women if they would have sex with Wayne Carey. 70% said, "Never again."

A man, on his way home from work was stuck in traffic which was much worse than usual. Noticing a policeman walking among the stalled cars, he asked, "Officer, what's the holdup?" The policeman says: "Wayne Carey is so depressed about being caught cheating that he's stopped his car and is threatening to douse himself in petrol and set himself on fire. He says his family hates him, fans hate him, his team mates hate him and he now won't have the $1 million from hisfooty contract. I'm walking around taking up a collection for him." "Oh, really?" the man says. "How much have you collected so far?" "So far only 18 litres, but a lot of people are still siphoning."

Q. What's the difference between Skippy and Wayne Carey? A: Skippy can root who he likes and still be a kangaroo!

Q: What's the difference between Wayne Carey and the Titanic? A: Only 1600 people went down on the Titanic.

Q: Why does Wayne Carey wear boxer shorts? A: To keep his ankles warm

Q: What is the first thing Wayne Carey does when he gets out of bed? A: He goes home.

Q. What's the difference between a microwave and Wayne Carey? A: A microwave stops when you open the door !!!